1. Put yourself first
Yes, FIRST. You are probably a people pleaser, aren’t you? I feel you. I am one too. And even if “yes” wasn’t your instant response to my question, you probably have people pleasing tendencies even if you don’t think you do. We can easily fall into the routine of putting aside our own dreams, desires, and needs to take care of those around us first. Don’t get me wrong – that’s awesome! Downright commendable. But not for birth. There. I said it. But it’s true! When you give birth YOU and YOUR needs need to be put first. YOU are the brain and the body from which your sweet babe will arrive. YOU need to be well taken care of (and therefore your baby is well taken care of!) and YOU need to have a great mindset. YOU have to be the center of it all.
2. Choose what you want
What is YOUR philosophy about birth? What do you want your birth experience to look like? What is most important to YOU? How do you want to feel before, during, and after your sweet babe has arrived? Who do you envision being with you as you birth your baby? Does their philosophy about birth match yours? Do they bring positive or negative energy? Do they make you feel safe? Do they include you in decision making?
So. Many. Questions. But really, take a moment to think about your answers. What do YOU want? YOU get to choose. Remember this is about you. This is your story. This is YOUR time.
3. Ask for what you want
Communicate your needs and express your desires. You have all the power – use it! Decide what you want and then make it known! Tell your care provider what you have chosen and what you desire your birth experience to be like. Let your team in on your vison so they can rally behind you!
4. Trust yourself and your decisions
You know what you need. Trust yourself. Surround yourself with a team of people who respect you and choose a care provider that provides care that is inclusive of your opinion. If at any point you feel uncomfortable with your care – switch providers.
5. Fuel a positive mindset
Feed your inner narrative with anything and everything that is confidence building and forget the rest! Your #1 job from this moment forward is to build a giant bubble around yourself warding off negativity. Don’t listen to it. Don’t accept it. Don’t allow it in your space. WALK AWAY. Just because you have a beautiful growing baby bump that all the world can see, does not give anyone permission to tear you down, question your beliefs, or get in your head. You CAN birth.
What makes you feel confident? What helps you keep a positive mindset? What is the hardest hurdle for you to jump to feel good?